Tossing the dice

I bought lottery tickets today. That's unusual because a I buy a lottery ticket maybe twice a year. And b I feel like playing the lottery is like taking a bucket of cash and tossing it in the ocean. You may get some back but chances are you won't get all of it back and there's an even slimmer chance you'll get a bunch of money back that wasn't yours to begin with. It's my saving gene kicking in - screaming do you know you could buy Starbucks with that three dollars or better yet save it and make five dollars?

The thing is I dream about winning the lottery quite a bit. Do you? I have whole scenario in my head. Me quitting my job. Me keeping my job. Me volunteering instead of working. Buying homes. Paying off my home. Going on trips. Buying another dog. But the heart of my dream is pretty realistic. Even if I won the mega millions. The craziest my dream lottery spending got was paying off my home, getting a tricked out Mazda and buying a second home closer to my husband's parents. Wow... big spender. No crazy designer shopping sprees. No lavish vacation homes in secluded islands. And even worse, my dreams are usually filled with the negatives of winning the lottery. The family and friends hitting you up for cash. How to handle that? Do you give them money? Do you tell them no get their own winning ticket? Could I not work and comfortably live out the rest of my life on a few million? Or better yet, how do I put it in enough banks and credit unions so all of  millions are properly insured by the NCUA or FDIC? I wonder how many other lottery winners think like that? But that's the practical side of me kicking in. The part of me that can quickly and easily silence the fashionista side that drools over designer shoes with a quick - you could buy a car with that (and besides you can get a decent knock-off version for a quarter the cost).

Yet, tonight I'm tossing the dice and crossing my fingers that I at least make back my three dollars. The funny thing is, yeah it would be nice to win it all but I truly believe money doesn't buy happiness. And honestly, I'd be happy with enough to pay off my house, buy a new car and put some money in savings. Nothing crazy. But let's just say I wouldn't complain if I won the whole thing either.